Britain is awash with people grimly coming to the realisation that Winter is upon us. October begins on Monday, there are severe weather warnings across the country and central heating systems are groaning back to life. The mood is bleak and folk are glum.
But I think you should turn that frown upside down. There are so many reasons to love Winter so here is your guide to making the most of what tends to be the most hated season.
The Weather
Now, you're probably of the opinion that there is nothing to love about the cold weather but you'd be mistaken. How often in Summer do you make plans only to have them foiled at the last minute because of the rain? That will never happen in Winter. We always plan for the worst in these upcoming months, we know it could rain at a moments notice and that it'll be cold so we can make arrangements. Plus, there's always the hope of that wonderful rare beast making an appearance - The Snow Day. You go to bed and when you wake up in the morning the streets are under a blanket of glorious white frosty glitter. The roads aren't safe so you couldn't possibly make your way to the office, the kids can't go to school and everyone gets a fun packed day off. I know for some people like doctors, firemen and the police that snow days mean a lot more hassle and I salute them for putting up with it while the rest of us snuggle under the duvet or have a snowball fight.
The Fashion
This one is probably more for the girls than the boys. Winter fashion is simply superb - chunky jumpers and boots a-go-go. Summer fashion is great too, all the floaty dresses and sandals etc but there is so much work to go with it. Fake tan, hair removal, pedicures and the all the rest. In Winter you can put on some tights and nobody is going to know that you've not shaved your legs. For the insecure among us the constant pressure of having a Bikini Body disappears for another year. Sure the wind and rain might spoil our hair and make-up a few times but it's not much that can't be fixed with a comb and a quick touch up. Hayfever on the other hand ensures that you look like a puffy eyed, runny nosed, groggy goblin all day long.
The Sleep
No more sleepless nights is a big enough reason to break out the flags and welcome Winter. You can go to bed and not spend hours tossing and turning because of the muggy heated nights. It might be cold outside but you've got a hot water bottle, your favourite pyjamas and a heavily togged duvet. A good nights sleep is practically guaranteed.
The Food
We all love seasonal fresh fruit and salads in Summer but they can't compare to the pure comfort of Winter food. Folk can dust off the slow cookers, chuck in a few ingredients and when they get home from work they have a perfect casserole waiting for them. No fuss, no effort. Winter hails the return of the Roast Dinner. Just pause for a moment to savour the thought. ROAST DINNERS. Succulent meat, fluffy potatoes, piles of vegetables, gravy. All on the same plate. It's a dream come true.
The Celebrations
Christmas. Christmas. Christmas.
Many people don't like the run up to Christmas as they feel it's been hijacked by shops and is too commercial. That's fine and I can see where they're coming from. Personally I absolutely LOVE Christmas. It's not about the money it's about the spirit. I enjoy Christmas because of the time spent with loved ones and the extended break from work. Even the naysayers who don't enjoy the run up to the big day chill out and enjoy themselves. It's perfectly acceptable to drink a bucks fizz for breakfast, have a few Baileys during the day and polish off some spirits in the afternoon so even if you can't bring yourself to enjoy the festivities, at least you can blot the day out in a haze of alcohol.
So, next time you look out the window and feel a bit bleak, remember that there are loads of reasons not to regret the onset of Winter. Grab yourself a hot water bottle and some roast potatoes and enjoy them.
Tuesday 25 September 2012
Tuesday 18 September 2012
Normal Girls Are Not Jealous of Strippers. Fact.
I love being a girl. Despite what the feminists may think of me I love being able to buy shoes for every occasion. I love being able to paint my nails in all the colours of the rainbows and top them with glitter. I love being able to go all out with my eyeshadow.
But most of all I love being able to appreciate the beauty of other women without worrying what my friends or society thinks of me. I can watch Doctor Who and marvel over Karen Gillan with her perfect skin. I can see a photo of Rihanna in a bikini and say "wow - what a body". I can go shopping with a friend and tell her that she's found a killer top that flatters her in all the right places. I can talk about Emma Stone being a total babe with my other female friends without worrying that they'll think I'm secretly in the closet. Sadly, this is something men can't do. If a bloke went to the pub and said to his friends "Cor, have you seen Eric in True Blood? That is something special" he would be mocked relentlessly probably for the rest of his life.
Girls can find beauty in other girls when men might overlook it. We can see a beautiful smile, great hair or sparkling eyes while men might just see body or bust sizes. I know the old adage 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' but I wish that men could understand how women work when it comes to rating other women.
What comes up time and time again is if any man overhears any woman making what he perceives to be a negative remark about a semi-naked female. It could be a Page 3 girl, a porn star or even that strange creature in a body stocking on X-Factor last week and it might be a remark as innocent as "oops, she's forgotten to fake tan her underarms". The first thing he will say is "you're only saying that because you're jealous".
No. We. Are. Not.
What are we supposed to be jealous of exactly? That we aren't in the paper pouting whilst simultaneously cupping our breasts? Oh wait, maybe we're supposed to be jealous that we aren't as thin as the model. Or should we be jealous that we aren't as pretty? It doesn't work that way. We might say "oh dear, she's got an orange face from the wrong foundation" but that doesn't mean we're slating her or calling her ugly. It's just an observation. Looking a picture of a female celeb on the red carpet and saying that we don't like her dress because it's not the right cut for her isn't a catty remark, it's simply a fashion critique. We may have swooned over her dress at an awards ceremony the week before.
Men are allowed to openly criticise and pass judgement on other men when it comes to sports but they're not laughed at and called jealous. If anything, men are more likely to be jealous of their sporting heroes than girls are of strippers. Getting paid a ton of cash to kick a ball around, have a huge house, fast car and a good looking wife is obviously quite the incentive. On the other hand being a stripper means an eternity of dieting, plucking, waxing, shaving, dying, straightening, cleansing, toning, moisturising and dancing around for men who can't find a woman willing to get naked for him without being paid. Creepy and a lot of hard work.
Some girls might have an issue with the man, or indeed woman, in her life watching porn or looking at boobs on Page 3 but it's not out of jealousy. It's out of respect for herself.
At some point in every woman's life they have tried to impress their significant other. For some this could involve a 3 day pampering ritual starting with the removal of all their body hair from the neck down, others may go to the hairdresser or they could simply wear that special dress they know their partner loves. Standing there naked with it all hanging out and on show is pretty much the least effort you can go to.
Ask any man if he'd be happy with his daughter, sister or girlfriend doing porn or Page 3 and the chances are he'll say no. Why? Because he knows how men think and that they will only see her as a pair of boobs with no respect. So it's ok for men to forget these girls are human beings and talk about what they'd like to do to her and objectify her but if another woman says she should reshape her eyebrows then she's the one in the wrong because she's jealous? Yes, it all makes perfect sense.
Personally I don't see anything wrong with getting your body out as a career so long as it is something you haven't been forced into. My cousin has made a fortune from dancing round a pole. She's paid for her house, always has a new car, nice clothes and the latest gadgets etc. and it's been her choice. She's a genius because essentially men are paying her to wiggle to the music for a few minutes. They don't get to touch her and if they annoy her she can get them thrown out, minus their money of course.
Guys, if you took a girl home to meet your parents and had to tell them that she was a topless model would you be comfortable doing it? If your mum didn't approve you almost certainly wouldn't say it was because she was jealous would you? So why do you say it to your platonic friends and colleagues?
The next time you hear a girl say something about another woman don't assume the worst and think she's been possessed by the green-eyed monster. Respect her enough to acknowledge that she's allowed an opinion on whether nipple tassels look tacky.
But most of all I love being able to appreciate the beauty of other women without worrying what my friends or society thinks of me. I can watch Doctor Who and marvel over Karen Gillan with her perfect skin. I can see a photo of Rihanna in a bikini and say "wow - what a body". I can go shopping with a friend and tell her that she's found a killer top that flatters her in all the right places. I can talk about Emma Stone being a total babe with my other female friends without worrying that they'll think I'm secretly in the closet. Sadly, this is something men can't do. If a bloke went to the pub and said to his friends "Cor, have you seen Eric in True Blood? That is something special" he would be mocked relentlessly probably for the rest of his life.
Girls can find beauty in other girls when men might overlook it. We can see a beautiful smile, great hair or sparkling eyes while men might just see body or bust sizes. I know the old adage 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' but I wish that men could understand how women work when it comes to rating other women.
What comes up time and time again is if any man overhears any woman making what he perceives to be a negative remark about a semi-naked female. It could be a Page 3 girl, a porn star or even that strange creature in a body stocking on X-Factor last week and it might be a remark as innocent as "oops, she's forgotten to fake tan her underarms". The first thing he will say is "you're only saying that because you're jealous".
No. We. Are. Not.
What are we supposed to be jealous of exactly? That we aren't in the paper pouting whilst simultaneously cupping our breasts? Oh wait, maybe we're supposed to be jealous that we aren't as thin as the model. Or should we be jealous that we aren't as pretty? It doesn't work that way. We might say "oh dear, she's got an orange face from the wrong foundation" but that doesn't mean we're slating her or calling her ugly. It's just an observation. Looking a picture of a female celeb on the red carpet and saying that we don't like her dress because it's not the right cut for her isn't a catty remark, it's simply a fashion critique. We may have swooned over her dress at an awards ceremony the week before.
Men are allowed to openly criticise and pass judgement on other men when it comes to sports but they're not laughed at and called jealous. If anything, men are more likely to be jealous of their sporting heroes than girls are of strippers. Getting paid a ton of cash to kick a ball around, have a huge house, fast car and a good looking wife is obviously quite the incentive. On the other hand being a stripper means an eternity of dieting, plucking, waxing, shaving, dying, straightening, cleansing, toning, moisturising and dancing around for men who can't find a woman willing to get naked for him without being paid. Creepy and a lot of hard work.
Some girls might have an issue with the man, or indeed woman, in her life watching porn or looking at boobs on Page 3 but it's not out of jealousy. It's out of respect for herself.
At some point in every woman's life they have tried to impress their significant other. For some this could involve a 3 day pampering ritual starting with the removal of all their body hair from the neck down, others may go to the hairdresser or they could simply wear that special dress they know their partner loves. Standing there naked with it all hanging out and on show is pretty much the least effort you can go to.
Ask any man if he'd be happy with his daughter, sister or girlfriend doing porn or Page 3 and the chances are he'll say no. Why? Because he knows how men think and that they will only see her as a pair of boobs with no respect. So it's ok for men to forget these girls are human beings and talk about what they'd like to do to her and objectify her but if another woman says she should reshape her eyebrows then she's the one in the wrong because she's jealous? Yes, it all makes perfect sense.
Personally I don't see anything wrong with getting your body out as a career so long as it is something you haven't been forced into. My cousin has made a fortune from dancing round a pole. She's paid for her house, always has a new car, nice clothes and the latest gadgets etc. and it's been her choice. She's a genius because essentially men are paying her to wiggle to the music for a few minutes. They don't get to touch her and if they annoy her she can get them thrown out, minus their money of course.
Guys, if you took a girl home to meet your parents and had to tell them that she was a topless model would you be comfortable doing it? If your mum didn't approve you almost certainly wouldn't say it was because she was jealous would you? So why do you say it to your platonic friends and colleagues?
The next time you hear a girl say something about another woman don't assume the worst and think she's been possessed by the green-eyed monster. Respect her enough to acknowledge that she's allowed an opinion on whether nipple tassels look tacky.
Monday 17 September 2012
The Fasting/Foraging Diet
I don't think I've ever felt more popular than I have this past week. Firstly there have been a ton of questions about the Oreo Truffle recipe and secondly I've been road testing a diet that I recently heard about which has definitely got people talking.
By way of a bit of background info, I would never say I've struggled with my weight until now. My wardrobe has clothes that range from a 10 to a 16 and it's never been a problem. I have beefed up and slimmed down more times than a celeb with a fitness video because I love the wrong kinds of food. It may also surprise people to learn that I am an incredibly fussy eater. Most of the time when I'm trying out a new recipe I won't be eating it myself, it'll just be Rich or the rest of my family while I sit down with toast.
In the past I would have no trouble shedding the pounds in a very short space of time. If I had an event to go to I knew I could do my self-invented Lucozade diet and I'd be guaranteed to lose half a stone in 5 days. The Slimming World diet would guarantee a drop in dress size in a month. All that has changed since I started taking steroids for my kidney transplant. I put on THREE STONE in 4 months after the transplant due to the steroids and even though I stopped taking them in July, their legacy lives on. It's still soul-destroyingly difficult to lose even one pound a week so I'm willing to try anything.
The premise of the diet is this: fast on one day, feed on the next. The original diet is called the 5:2 diet because you fast on 2 alternating days eating less than 600 calories and eat whatever you want regardless of calories on the others. For the first 2 days of the diet I thought the feeding days had a limit of 1600 calories but I changed this on day three when I found out. I also decided to fast on Monday, Wednesday and Friday with a limit of 500 calories a day.
I weighed myself on Monday morning and saw I have 6.6lbs I want to lose as quickly as possible. Throughout the week I drink only water and Pepsi Max. I don't drink tea or coffee anyway so having to cut these out to save on calories from milk and sugar isn't an issue for me.
Monday - fasting
I skip breakfast and by lunchtime I'm not even remotely hungry. Surprisingly I don't get hungry until 5pm so I eat some Nutri-Grain breakfast biscuits at 189 calories. They fill me up and I'm fine until 8pm when I have a slice of dry toast at 100 calories. Total calories for the day 289 with no side effects or feeling ill.
Tuesday - feeding
Again, I'm not hungry at breakfast so I skip it. At work I feel fine, no problems at all. I have some breakfast biscuits for lunch at 189 calories. At 5pm I'm starving but Rich is at the cinema tonight so I'm not cooking any dinner and I'm too lazy to make something for just me. I have a packet of Wotsits, a plain wrap and a Rice Krispie square which comes in at under 450 calories. Only 2 hours later I'm ravenous so I raid the freezer to find something quick to cook and come up trumps with some Tesco potato animal shapes, hardly cordon bleu healthy cuisine but it'll do. I have them with some ketchup and it comes to 500 calories. Total for today 1,139 calories.
Wednesday - fasting
I realise I've been missing loads of nutrients so I decide from now on my fasting days will consist of breakfast biscuits, an apple and grape bag, a banana and a Babybel. This totals 380 calories giving me a 120 calorie buffer if I need it. I've come to the conclusion that I can miss breakfast without it upsetting me so today is no different. I do notice today that I'm incredibly scatty. I do the weekly food shop and buy the wrong crisps for Rich. I also keep leaving things around the house and forgetting what I was doing 2 seconds before. Putting the shopping away is frustrating because I kept misplacing things. I eat my biscuits, apple and grapes, banana and Babybel by 5pm but by 6pm I feel like I've not eaten at all. I have another Babybel and I'm fine after that. Total calories for today 450.
Thursday - feeding
I wake up at 5.45am to take Rich to the station for a business trip. By the time I get home I feel like I could eat a horse. I practically inhale 2 scotch pancakes, some breakfast biscuits and a class of milk. This comes in at a whopping 500 calories - more than I ate in the entire day yesterday. At work all I can think about is food and I start planning my lunch from 9.01am. I get home at 1pm and I cook 100 grams of pasta and add 3 tablespoons of tomato pasata and 15g of cheese. I also cook 2 pieces of garlic bread. Lunch is around 600 calories and I'm in physical pain after eating it. I lay on the sofa unable to move because I feel sick from eating so much in one go but all I can think about is something sweet so 30 minutes later I steal one of Rich's cake bars at 135 calories. I don't have any dinner but when I collect Rich from the station at 8pm he says he's hungry. We go to Burger King drive-thru as it's quick and easy. Despite stuffing my face all day long I order a Rodeo Burger for 585 calories and eat it all. I am horrified at how much food I've eaten today and feel disgusted with myself. I can't see how I'm going to lose any weight like this. I feel heavy, fat, depressed and bloated. Total calories for today 1,820.
Friday - fasting
I'm painting the meeting room at work today. I have no breakfast again but I feel great all morning, full of energy and able to climb up and down step ladders without any trouble. I go straight to the shopping centre after work to buy a book. As I walk past Boots I have to fight the the urge to throw-up because of the smell of cosmetics wafting out the door. I realise I should have eaten before going. I go to bed when I get home for a nap without eating. I don't get hungry at all today. I have some breakfast biscuits at 6pm. An hour later I have a Babybel and a banana. I have a shot of Malibu as well. Total calories for today is under 400.
Saturday and Sunday - feeding
I didn't really calorie count at the weekend. I just ate whenever I was hungry.
On Saturday I had some Philadelphia Light Garlic & Herbs with some crackers and 3 mini Twix bites (about 1 side of a normal Twix) at lunch time. For our dinner I want to use up some of the random bits and pieces in the fridge so I grill some sausages and cut them up really fine. I mix them with pasta, pasata and cheese. I also have a tiny chunk of garlic tear and share bread. Oh, and 2 slices of halloumi. Later on I have a caramel shortbread.
On Sunday I have a slice of white bread with a very thin spread of smooth peanut butter for breakfast. Between 10am and 6pm I have 2 Oreo cookies and an Oreo Truffle, nothing else. I then have more Philadelphia and crackers. I'm still hungry an hour later though so I have a plain wrap and a banana. I also have a (hefty) shot of Malibu.
THE WEIGH IN - EEK
I think about all the terrible food I've eaten this week. Chocolate, bread, peanut butter, a packet of Wotsits, a burger, cheese, pasta etc. I am appalled at how much junk I've eaten and I'm convinced I can't have lost any weight having had all that crap. I can imagine the renal dietician having a fit over the lack of fruit and vegetables and I cringe at the thought.
To my amazement when I step on the scales I've lost 2.6lbs - over a kilo. The fact I usually struggle to lose even 1lb a week makes this a small miracle.
I haven't felt dizzy once. I've kept a very close eye on my blood sugar levels and every time I've tested them they are well within the healthy recommendations of between 5 and 7. I've not experienced any headaches and aside from being a bit scatty and almost being sick outside Boots I've felt ok all week. On my fasting days I've cooked dinner for Rich and haven't once been tempted to snaffle a mouthful or steal a bit.
Overall, I've loved this diet but I think it encourages you to eat junk on your days off. There isn't a single vegetable on my entire weekly intake and that is simply not good enough. I don't especially like vegetables anyway but I can certainly make more of an effort to include them. Now that I've had a week on the diet I know what to expect so I can make adjustments accordingly.
I will continue with the diet for the planned 3 week period and I'm seriously considering keeping it up for the rest of the year.
By way of a bit of background info, I would never say I've struggled with my weight until now. My wardrobe has clothes that range from a 10 to a 16 and it's never been a problem. I have beefed up and slimmed down more times than a celeb with a fitness video because I love the wrong kinds of food. It may also surprise people to learn that I am an incredibly fussy eater. Most of the time when I'm trying out a new recipe I won't be eating it myself, it'll just be Rich or the rest of my family while I sit down with toast.
In the past I would have no trouble shedding the pounds in a very short space of time. If I had an event to go to I knew I could do my self-invented Lucozade diet and I'd be guaranteed to lose half a stone in 5 days. The Slimming World diet would guarantee a drop in dress size in a month. All that has changed since I started taking steroids for my kidney transplant. I put on THREE STONE in 4 months after the transplant due to the steroids and even though I stopped taking them in July, their legacy lives on. It's still soul-destroyingly difficult to lose even one pound a week so I'm willing to try anything.
The premise of the diet is this: fast on one day, feed on the next. The original diet is called the 5:2 diet because you fast on 2 alternating days eating less than 600 calories and eat whatever you want regardless of calories on the others. For the first 2 days of the diet I thought the feeding days had a limit of 1600 calories but I changed this on day three when I found out. I also decided to fast on Monday, Wednesday and Friday with a limit of 500 calories a day.
I weighed myself on Monday morning and saw I have 6.6lbs I want to lose as quickly as possible. Throughout the week I drink only water and Pepsi Max. I don't drink tea or coffee anyway so having to cut these out to save on calories from milk and sugar isn't an issue for me.
Monday - fasting
I skip breakfast and by lunchtime I'm not even remotely hungry. Surprisingly I don't get hungry until 5pm so I eat some Nutri-Grain breakfast biscuits at 189 calories. They fill me up and I'm fine until 8pm when I have a slice of dry toast at 100 calories. Total calories for the day 289 with no side effects or feeling ill.
Tuesday - feeding
Again, I'm not hungry at breakfast so I skip it. At work I feel fine, no problems at all. I have some breakfast biscuits for lunch at 189 calories. At 5pm I'm starving but Rich is at the cinema tonight so I'm not cooking any dinner and I'm too lazy to make something for just me. I have a packet of Wotsits, a plain wrap and a Rice Krispie square which comes in at under 450 calories. Only 2 hours later I'm ravenous so I raid the freezer to find something quick to cook and come up trumps with some Tesco potato animal shapes, hardly cordon bleu healthy cuisine but it'll do. I have them with some ketchup and it comes to 500 calories. Total for today 1,139 calories.
Wednesday - fasting
I realise I've been missing loads of nutrients so I decide from now on my fasting days will consist of breakfast biscuits, an apple and grape bag, a banana and a Babybel. This totals 380 calories giving me a 120 calorie buffer if I need it. I've come to the conclusion that I can miss breakfast without it upsetting me so today is no different. I do notice today that I'm incredibly scatty. I do the weekly food shop and buy the wrong crisps for Rich. I also keep leaving things around the house and forgetting what I was doing 2 seconds before. Putting the shopping away is frustrating because I kept misplacing things. I eat my biscuits, apple and grapes, banana and Babybel by 5pm but by 6pm I feel like I've not eaten at all. I have another Babybel and I'm fine after that. Total calories for today 450.
Thursday - feeding
I wake up at 5.45am to take Rich to the station for a business trip. By the time I get home I feel like I could eat a horse. I practically inhale 2 scotch pancakes, some breakfast biscuits and a class of milk. This comes in at a whopping 500 calories - more than I ate in the entire day yesterday. At work all I can think about is food and I start planning my lunch from 9.01am. I get home at 1pm and I cook 100 grams of pasta and add 3 tablespoons of tomato pasata and 15g of cheese. I also cook 2 pieces of garlic bread. Lunch is around 600 calories and I'm in physical pain after eating it. I lay on the sofa unable to move because I feel sick from eating so much in one go but all I can think about is something sweet so 30 minutes later I steal one of Rich's cake bars at 135 calories. I don't have any dinner but when I collect Rich from the station at 8pm he says he's hungry. We go to Burger King drive-thru as it's quick and easy. Despite stuffing my face all day long I order a Rodeo Burger for 585 calories and eat it all. I am horrified at how much food I've eaten today and feel disgusted with myself. I can't see how I'm going to lose any weight like this. I feel heavy, fat, depressed and bloated. Total calories for today 1,820.
Friday - fasting
I'm painting the meeting room at work today. I have no breakfast again but I feel great all morning, full of energy and able to climb up and down step ladders without any trouble. I go straight to the shopping centre after work to buy a book. As I walk past Boots I have to fight the the urge to throw-up because of the smell of cosmetics wafting out the door. I realise I should have eaten before going. I go to bed when I get home for a nap without eating. I don't get hungry at all today. I have some breakfast biscuits at 6pm. An hour later I have a Babybel and a banana. I have a shot of Malibu as well. Total calories for today is under 400.
Saturday and Sunday - feeding
I didn't really calorie count at the weekend. I just ate whenever I was hungry.
On Saturday I had some Philadelphia Light Garlic & Herbs with some crackers and 3 mini Twix bites (about 1 side of a normal Twix) at lunch time. For our dinner I want to use up some of the random bits and pieces in the fridge so I grill some sausages and cut them up really fine. I mix them with pasta, pasata and cheese. I also have a tiny chunk of garlic tear and share bread. Oh, and 2 slices of halloumi. Later on I have a caramel shortbread.
On Sunday I have a slice of white bread with a very thin spread of smooth peanut butter for breakfast. Between 10am and 6pm I have 2 Oreo cookies and an Oreo Truffle, nothing else. I then have more Philadelphia and crackers. I'm still hungry an hour later though so I have a plain wrap and a banana. I also have a (hefty) shot of Malibu.
THE WEIGH IN - EEK
I think about all the terrible food I've eaten this week. Chocolate, bread, peanut butter, a packet of Wotsits, a burger, cheese, pasta etc. I am appalled at how much junk I've eaten and I'm convinced I can't have lost any weight having had all that crap. I can imagine the renal dietician having a fit over the lack of fruit and vegetables and I cringe at the thought.
To my amazement when I step on the scales I've lost 2.6lbs - over a kilo. The fact I usually struggle to lose even 1lb a week makes this a small miracle.
I haven't felt dizzy once. I've kept a very close eye on my blood sugar levels and every time I've tested them they are well within the healthy recommendations of between 5 and 7. I've not experienced any headaches and aside from being a bit scatty and almost being sick outside Boots I've felt ok all week. On my fasting days I've cooked dinner for Rich and haven't once been tempted to snaffle a mouthful or steal a bit.
Overall, I've loved this diet but I think it encourages you to eat junk on your days off. There isn't a single vegetable on my entire weekly intake and that is simply not good enough. I don't especially like vegetables anyway but I can certainly make more of an effort to include them. Now that I've had a week on the diet I know what to expect so I can make adjustments accordingly.
I will continue with the diet for the planned 3 week period and I'm seriously considering keeping it up for the rest of the year.
Sunday 16 September 2012
Oreo Truffle Bites
Oreo Truffle Bites
I recently made some brownies with a layer of Oreo truffle on the top. The amount of questions I got about the truffle bit was insane. This week alone three of my friends have made them and others are planning on giving them a go. I figured I should do a more detailed blog concentrating just on the truffle recipe, so I have. In my original recipe I used a mixture of chocolate spread and cream cheese to make the truffles but this time round I've stuck with just the chocolate spread.
As you can see from the picture above I have decorated mine with some milk chocolate. You can use absolutely anything your heart desires. If you're a sprinkles fan you can shake some over while the chocolate is still wet, you could roll them in coconut flakes, dust them with edible glitter, top them with Oreo crumbs, add some popping candy... the possibilities are limitless.
Here comes the science.
Ingredients.
2 packets of Oreos
1 packet of SilverSpoon white chocolate cake covering
Chocolate spread, Nutella or Cadbury is fine
Petit Four cases (not strictly an ingredient!)
Break the Oreos into a food processor. Keep back 2 or 3 cookies just in case the mixture goes too wet when you add the chocolate spread. If you don't need them I'm sure you can find some other use for them *stuffs left over Oreo into mouth*
Blitz the broken Oreos until you get some really fine crumbs.
Now add two heaped tablespoons of chocolate spread. This will not be enough to finish the mixture but it's just to get it going.
You should get something that looks like this.
As you can see it's still dry and crumbly. You need to add more chocolate spread in small amounts until the mixture comes together into a shiny dough. If the dough becomes too wet you won't be able to make truffle shapes out of it which is why having a couple of spare back up cookies is a good idea. If you need to use them bash them with a rolling pin a few times to break them up and add them to the mixture.
Once you have your shiny, smooth dough you can start making truffles. Place a piece of greaseproof paper onto a tray. Roll chunks of dough into balls and set them on the tray to rest. I'm sure you'll do a better job than I did at getting them all the same size. Oops!
Keep going until all the mixture is gone. Put the tray in the fridge for 30 minutes to firm up the truffles as they'll be easier to coat in chocolate.
Melt your chocolate however you want. I prefer to do mine in a glass bowl in the microwave by blasting the chocolate in 25 second batches, stirring and then repeating until it has all melted. You could of course melt yours in a double boiler on the stove top. Dip the truffles in chocolate one at a time and roll them around to get an even coating. Let as much chocolate drip off as possible over the bowl and then put them back on your paper covered tray. If you put them down with one swift movement and don't let them move around on the paper your puddle of chocolate under the truffle will be smaller and neater. I used two teaspoons to get them in and out of the chocolate. Remember, if you're using sprinkles or want something to stick to the outside of the truffles you need to put it on while the chocolate is still wet. If you're decorating them with more chocolate you can leave them to set while you get on with coating the others.
I decided to use up some left over milk chocolate to decorate mine. I melted it and used a small piping bag to drizzle the chocolate over the top of the truffles. Then I put them into colourful petit four cases.
I'm taking these truffles to work so to safely transport them there I've lined a cake box with some purple tissue paper and lined them up neatly. I think they look great in this box and they've come out better than expected.
These truffles are so easy and quick to make and there isn't really a wrong way of doing them. If your mixture isn't smooth then it doesn't matter, I think getting a little crunchy bit of Oreo inside would be an extra treat. Since no baking is involved they'd be a great thing to do with your kids because they can get involved. Obviously they wouldn't be able to use the food processor but if you transfer the dough to a separate bowl they can get stuck in with both hands making shapes and covering them in chocolate. Perfect messy fun for a weekend afternoon. They're relatively cheap to make too. The Oreos and chocolate cost less than £3 and by the time you add in a few spoonfuls of chocolate spread, petit four cases and some sprinkles you'll still have change from a fiver and you'll have 30 truffles out of it!
Here are some of the fabulous truffles my friends made this week.
Made by the Emma. Follow her here on Twitter. They look ace, who can resist sprinkles?!
Made by Sam. Follow her here on Twitter. What a great idea for a thank you gift, wouldn't you love to receive a little bag of these?
Made by Charley. Follow her here on Twitter. Making them into lollies is nothing short of genius.
If you make some of these truffles, let me know and I'll add your photo to the little gallery of delicousness I've got here!
Friday 7 September 2012
The K-Factor: Organ Auditions
I realise that this news has been public for a few weeks now but I'm only just able to control my feelings enough to write this blog. I got as far typing the title and started to doubt whether I'd be able to finish, it is such an emotive subject for me.
There are some truly special people who seek to donate a kidney to a stranger and there is a system in this country to allow them to do that. It's known as altruistic donation and after seeking medical advice and having the necessary tests a recipient is found by comparing who on the waiting list best matches that organ (there are various markers such as blood type, tissue type etc). The donor has no say in who their kidney goes to.
MatchingDonors is a website that allows renal patients to advertise their need for a kidney in the hope of finding a donor. They can post whatever they want from a photo, the details of why they need help or a back story of their family life.
After having my kidney transplant last year and knowing exactly what these patients are going through I felt it was important to go on record as saying that I fully support this website.
I appreciate the concerns that people have. You are basically auditioning to an unknown audience who get to decide whether to save your life or move onto the next page. However, I actually think this is a good thing, at least for the donor.
Something that comes up when you talk about donation, whether for right or wrong reasons, is the issue of who gets the organs. It could go to somebody you wouldn't approve of. An example that springs to mind is when George Best was given a new liver after destroying his own one through alcoholism. He continued to drink alcohol and ultimately died 3 years later. Whether he should or shouldn't have been given the liver is not for me to comment on but I can't help wondering who else on the waiting list was passed over so he could have another chance.
The website would remove the uncertainty over who will get the benefit of your gift. Obviously George's donor was dead but would the family of the deceased have been pleased to know their loved ones liver had been wasted? Being a live kidney donor is not something to be taken lightly and the prospect of it going to somebody who won't appreciate it has to be considered. I think it's perfectly acceptable to want to be sure that the recipient will treasure it, look after it and live their life to the full and that is exactly what the website will facilitate.
Of course not everybody has a tragic tale to tell. If I was uploading an audition I wouldn't be able to compete with the "please help me, I want to see my children grow up" or "I've had to put my doctorate on hold while I have treatment" but for every person that finds a kidney via the website, it's one less person on the waiting list meaning I'd have a better chance, however remote, of getting the call we all dream of from the hospital. Whatever your viewpoint, less people on the waiting list can only ever be a good thing.
I understand when people say that we don't have a right to play god or that we have no right to judge who is more deserving than others. But, the first British woman to sign up to the website is a mother of 3 young children who is in her situation through no fault of her own. Wouldn't you rather your organ helped her over somebody who destroyed their kidneys through drugs or alcohol? I'm absolutely not saying that people who fall in that category should receive no help, I'm only suggesting that if you got to choose then surely knowing you'd enabled a family to stay together would be your preferred option.
There is such a shortage of organs not just at home but on a global level and there is a black market for kidneys that will continue to thrive at the detriment of the poverty stricken donors until the amount of organs available drastically increases. There is huge potential for this website to entice people to join the donor list for when they die. If they read the stories behind the patients it might spur them into signing up. Being a living donor isn't something that is going to appeal to everyone and that is fair enough. Why would you put yourself through an unnecessary procedure for no benefit to yourself? But there is NO REASON AT ALL not to donate your organs when you die and if people become aware of how much they could change another persons life and sign up then it is hugely beneficial to everyone.
With regards to my own health I will need another kidney at some point in the future. The average transplant lasts around 10-15 years although there are cases of them lasting 20, 30 and even 40 years. The next time round I won't be able to get one from my mum and I'm an only child so I don't have any siblings I can guilt trip or bribe into helping me. Having the horrifying promise of more dialysis in my future terrifies me. We are so lucky in the UK because the average waiting time for a donor is only 2 years, in America it's 3-5 years and in South Africa it is 5 years.
I could write for hours and I'd still never be able to properly explain just how debilitating and terrible dialysis is. It's relentless. If this website allows people to escape this torture whether by finding a donor directly or removing people from the waiting list then it must be celebrated. I will admit that the fact you must pay to advertise your needs does repulse me slightly but after your first dialysis session you soon realise there isn't much you wouldn't do to free yourself from the machine so I'm sure many patients would see the fee as a necessary evil. I would love it if a payment-free version of the system was available though.
For the people who have been quick to slam the idea behind it, try and imagine your life on hold for several years whilst having invasive treatment 3 times a week. If you experienced it for a day you wouldn't be so quick to judge.
Thursday 6 September 2012
Oreo Truffle Marshmallow Chocolate Brownies
Oreo Truffle Marshmallow Chocolate Brownies
I'm going to a party at the end of the month and I've promised to bring some baked goods. The host isn't keen on buttercream and I needed something that travels well as the event is in London. Brownies are one of the most robust things I could think of and the birthday boy is an Oreo fan and thus these creations were born. The pictures are from a practice run I did yesterday.
You will need the following ingredients (plus some butter that I foolishly forgot to include):
To make the brownies:
100g cocoa
500g caster sugar
100g self-raising flour
250g butter
4 beaten eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
Preheat your oven to 180 degrees and line a small brownie tin.
Melt the butter in the microwave if you're impatient or in a saucepan.
Off the heat mix in the cocoa and sugar and stir until dissolved.
Add the eggs one at a time and mix until dissolved.
Finally, stir in the flour.
Transfer to your brownie tin and bake for 30 minutes.
After 30 minutes put a piece of greaseproof paper or silver foil and on top of the brownie to stop the edges burning and bake for another 10-15 minutes.
Test whether it's cooked by inserting a skewer and then leave to cool.
Of course, if you've got a favourite brownie recipe you can use that, anything will do! I took the brownie out of the pan and removed the greaseproof paper and then put the brownie back before doing the next steps.
To make the Oreo truffle:
20 Oreo cookies
1.5 tablespoons chocolate spread
1.5 tablespoons cream cheese
Crush the cookies in a food processor.
Add the chocolate spread and cream cheese and blitz.
The idea is to make a dough-like truffle consistency. If it's too wet you can add some icing sugar to bring it back, if it's too dry just add a little more cream cheese. It should be glossy and spreadable when you're finished. This stuff would be amazing just rolled into balls and coated with popping candy or coconut. I'm thinking of making some cakepops using this mix. If you don't have a food processor you can crush the cookies in a sandwich bag by bashing them with a rolling pin. It'll take longer and won't be as smooth but it'll be just as tasty.
When the brownie is completely cool spread the truffle mix on the top. You'll need to score a few lines on and make some dimples in it because marshmallow Fluff will stick to carpets, skin, dog fur and jeans but it seldom sticks to cake. I speak from painful experience. I once filled a cake with Fluff and when I checked on it a few hours later it had created a hole in the frosting and oozed out down the side. There were tears in the kitchen that day.
Now you need to add the Fluff. Because it is an unruly beast and will try to make an escape, you don't need to pour loads on. I used just under half a jar. I didn't have any problems with it running out after the brownies were cut with this amount. Also, Fluff is really sweet and these brownies don't need much help in the sugar department! If you accidentally mix in a bit of the truffle (like I did as you'll see from the photo below) it doesn't matter so don't worry.
Now you need to get the chocolate topping ready. Either melt it in a bowl over a pan of water or give it short bursts in the microwave. I always use the microwave because it's easier, cleaner and quicker. I would recommend SilverSpoon cake covering for things like this because it melts into a gloriously runny liquid making coverage so easy. Score the surface of the Fluff before you pour to help the chocolate stick to it and hold it in place. The chocolate needs to be room temperature before you start otherwise it'll upset the Fluff. I used half a bar of chocolate for this.
Now, what I should have done is add the crushed Oreos while the milk chocolate was still wet but being a domestic goddess (*cough*) I was making a carbonara at the same time and forgot to do this so I had to improvise.
I chopped the Oreos into little wedges and crumbs.
I then drizzled melted white chocolate all over the top of the brownies and scattered on the cookie pieces. Then I drizzled loads more white chocolate on top to stick the whole lot together. It worked but it wasn't how I wanted these brownies to look. That'll teach me to pay more attention.
Run a knife round the outside of the pan to release the brownie and then cut into cubes. They are obviously incredibly rich so a little goes a long, long way!
A close up. Please imagine some raunchy music playing in the background.
I only had a little nibble because although my diabetes is under control and has almost disappeared, I still didn't want to risk it. Rich took the brownies to work with him (my first baked goods contribution to his new job - eek!). They loved them and they've all gone. Somebody said it was the best brownie they've ever had so I can assure you that these are worth making if you need to make an impression.
Tuesday 4 September 2012
You put WHAT on the Internet??
Many years ago I read the following advice and I have to admit, it's stuck with me.
If your mum would be dismayed at you posting a picture of your one-night stand with the tag #bedofshame, if your mother-of-3 boss wouldn't see the funny side of your dead baby jokes and if your boyfriend would be unimpressed by you sending other men photos of your boobs then it's best you keep this sort of stuff offline.
There have been several news stories about people being caught out on Facebook; from cheating partners, teachers discussing pupils and folk pulling sickies due to hangovers. What your put on your profile is your business and you should have freedom of speech and expression but it's worth asking yourself whether what you're posting is going to get you in trouble. We've all seen this example:
If you want to call your boss a pervvy wanker, maybe you shouldn't do it on a platform where he's going to see it. Just a thought!
Yesterday I saw these tweets from somebody I follow:
.JPG)
Firstly it goes to show that the men I follow aren't desperate losers (give yourselves a pat on the back, guys) because until she posted those tweets I honestly didn't even know these things were happening. Secondly, she's right. Why should she have to see porno pics on her timeline because a sad-case is hoping he'll get to see a bit of nipple?
I'm not naive, I do know there is porn on Twitter - every other day I'm blocking yet another pornbot and we all had to reach for the eye-bleach after the Richard and Judy fiasco. But I had no idea that people are actually fueling the fire by RT-ing it. I wonder if they realise that the girls in question are probably people having fun at their expense. It's more likely to be someone who's found the photos online and is pretending it is their body. Seriously, there are more naked ladies on the internet than you could ever find the time to look at so why are you sending it onto other peoples news feeds? Obviously one of the wonderful features about Twitter is the fact you can just unfollow people but like the tweets above, it's a shame when you have to block contact with someone you like. I know my male (and some female) friends watch porn, it's not a problem, but they don't show it to me because I'm not interested and that's the way it should be.
Freedom of speech is so important but not everything needs saying. Sending threats of violence isn't exercising your rights, it only highlights the fact you're an idiot. These days anyone can be tracked down easily, either by what you've posted before, by your IP address if the police get involved or even by the online community - my personal favourite is when they found the guy at Burger King who had posted photos of himself standing in the lettuce. My Twitter account is in my name, not a pseudonym. I also have a very unusual name, there aren't likely to be any other Romany Scarlett Meehan's out there. Anything I say can be easily traced back to me and it's for that reason I'll never slag off my boss (although actually she's lovely so I would never need to), I'd keep things like that for when I'm at home.
So, next time you're thinking of posting something controversial ask yourself who might be reading and whether it's really worth it.
"Never put anything on the internet you wouldn't
want your mum, boss or partner to see"
There have been several news stories about people being caught out on Facebook; from cheating partners, teachers discussing pupils and folk pulling sickies due to hangovers. What your put on your profile is your business and you should have freedom of speech and expression but it's worth asking yourself whether what you're posting is going to get you in trouble. We've all seen this example:
If you want to call your boss a pervvy wanker, maybe you shouldn't do it on a platform where he's going to see it. Just a thought!
Yesterday I saw these tweets from somebody I follow:
.JPG)
Firstly it goes to show that the men I follow aren't desperate losers (give yourselves a pat on the back, guys) because until she posted those tweets I honestly didn't even know these things were happening. Secondly, she's right. Why should she have to see porno pics on her timeline because a sad-case is hoping he'll get to see a bit of nipple?
I'm not naive, I do know there is porn on Twitter - every other day I'm blocking yet another pornbot and we all had to reach for the eye-bleach after the Richard and Judy fiasco. But I had no idea that people are actually fueling the fire by RT-ing it. I wonder if they realise that the girls in question are probably people having fun at their expense. It's more likely to be someone who's found the photos online and is pretending it is their body. Seriously, there are more naked ladies on the internet than you could ever find the time to look at so why are you sending it onto other peoples news feeds? Obviously one of the wonderful features about Twitter is the fact you can just unfollow people but like the tweets above, it's a shame when you have to block contact with someone you like. I know my male (and some female) friends watch porn, it's not a problem, but they don't show it to me because I'm not interested and that's the way it should be.
Freedom of speech is so important but not everything needs saying. Sending threats of violence isn't exercising your rights, it only highlights the fact you're an idiot. These days anyone can be tracked down easily, either by what you've posted before, by your IP address if the police get involved or even by the online community - my personal favourite is when they found the guy at Burger King who had posted photos of himself standing in the lettuce. My Twitter account is in my name, not a pseudonym. I also have a very unusual name, there aren't likely to be any other Romany Scarlett Meehan's out there. Anything I say can be easily traced back to me and it's for that reason I'll never slag off my boss (although actually she's lovely so I would never need to), I'd keep things like that for when I'm at home.
So, next time you're thinking of posting something controversial ask yourself who might be reading and whether it's really worth it.
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